(Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message.)
Welcome to the birth prep podcast. I'm Taylor, your birth bestie, who's here to support you as you plan and prepare for the unmedicated birth of your dreams. If you're ready to ditch the fear, conquer the hospital hustle, support that bump and bod, and walk into the delivery room like the HGIC you were born to be, then buckle up, babe.
This is where it all goes down. Hello, hello, and welcome back to the birth prep podcast. Today, we're talking about pain.
And even if you are preparing for a pain-free birth, I'm still going to prepare you for pain. Even if you are aiming for an epidural, I'm still going to prepare you for pain. Why? Because pain-free births aren't guaranteed and epidurals don't always work.
So this is incredibly important. And if you're planning an unmedicated birth, you've probably heard something along the lines of, oh honey, you don't get a medal for suffering, or you don't get a cookie, whatever, insert thing here, or you're going to be begging for the epidural, or even, why would you even do that to yourself? Here's what those people don't understand. Choosing natural pain management isn't about trying to be a hero.
Pain doesn't equal suffering, and that it's all about working with your body, protecting your hormones, and owning that experience like the HGIC I know you are. So today we're going to break it down. Why natural pain relief actually works, the tools you'll want in your back pocket that day, and all my best tips and tricks to ride the waves instead of getting wrecked by them.
Let's do it. Why natural pain management actually works. Let's start with the science, because this isn't just about like candles and kumbaya.
Your body is literally brilliantly designed for birth. First, we have the fear-tension-pain cycle. When fear is present, that creates tension in your body, and that creates the pain that we feel.
When you're afraid, your body tenses. When you're tense, your muscles don't work efficiently. When your muscles don't work efficiently, contractions feel longer, they feel harder, and they feel more painful.
Natural pain management helps you break the cycle by reducing the fear, keeping your body soft, and open, and responsive, which is what we want because we're trying to birth a baby out of a very small space. We want to be open and relaxed. Next, your body already has built-in medicine.
Oxytocin and endorphins are your dream team during labor because oxytocin keeps labor progressing, and endorphins are literal painkillers, like stronger than morphine. They're amazing, but they only come out to play if your body feels safe and supported. Again, that plays into that fear-tension-pain cycle as well.
Stress, fluorescent lights, nurses who treat you like a checklist, all of that is such a turn-off for those hormones. If we want to keep those hormones going, we've got to keep them turned on. More on that in just a bit.
Number three, labor pain is an injury pain. It's purposeful. Contractions are your uterus doing its job.
This isn't something wrong pain. It's your baby is coming pain. When you can reframe it that way, it changes a lot.
You're not broken. You are powerful. Pain with progress is so different from pain with no purpose.
Your mindset can either amplify the pain or it can transform it. Now, let's talk about some things that can keep us out of the fear-tension-pain cycle, keep those oxytocin and endorphins flowing, and really build a rock-solid mindset for the big day. I know somebody's going to ask, so I'm just going to take care of it right now.
Do these natural pain management tools actually work? Yes, they do. These are evidence-based techniques. These aren't just cute ideas to put in your little toolbox for the big day.
These are tools that work because they align with how your brain and your body are wired. Almost everything that the typical hospital experience provides goes very against our physiology, but here are 10 things that work with it. You ready? Get your notes out.
Number one is breath work. This is a game-changer, and it's like, Taylor, it's just breathing. Oh, I know.
Let's talk about it. First of all, if you have a toddler, I know, I would bet money that you have said the phrase, take a deep breath, deep breaths. I don't know.
I say that all the time, right? I try to ground my children by having them take a deep breath, and there's other grounding techniques and stuff, but breathing is a really good one because it literally keeps your adrenaline low. It slows your heart rate. It helps you ride the waves instead of resisting them.
It gives you oxygen. It keeps you calm, and it keeps you in control. If you can get your breath under control, your whole body falls in line.
I experienced this with my first baby. I was so ... It was in so much pain. My eyesight was going.
I was just going through it, right? I remember I was at the point where I was nearly hyperventilating, and my mom stepped in, and she ... Because my husband was ... It was his first time. We were kids practically, and my mom stepped in and said to him, like, hey, she needs to get back on track. You need to help her breathe.
He helped me get my breathing back on track, and the way that my body came back down to earth, I don't know how else to describe it. The control came right back, right? I was able to control my breaths, and then my whole body fell in line with that. A little HGIC tip for you, make your breath audible.
It gives your brain something to focus on. It signals your team that you're working with the wave. Some low, guttural moaning can actually really help release tension in your body.
You don't have to do this one, but I do a breathe in for four, out for eight, breathing through your nose, blowing out through your lips, and kind of like you're blowing on soup, like nice pursed lips, like to cool things down. I remember as a kid, I learned ... I remember when I learned that if you did your lips one way, it was cold air, and if you did them another way, it was hot air. I just thought that was the weirdest and coolest thing.
It's still pretty cool and weird, right? But we want the cold air, okay? But there are so many breathing techniques out there. You can find what works for you. Practice them in advance, so it's second nature when you are in the thick of things.
Number two, movement and position changes. You are not a statue, girl. Write it down.
I am not a statue. Contractions feel better when you move, walk, sway, do a little slow dance, bounce on that yoga ball, squat a little bit. Gravity helps baby descend.
Movement equals pelvic flexibility, which equals more space, which equals less pain. So try some hip circles on your birth ball, some standing lunges, some hands and knees rocking. I like that one a lot.
Side lunges with one foot on a stool. There's so many positions. Do a little Google search, find your little favorites, and stick them in your toolbox for the big day.
Unless you're resting or you're in like a really deep in the groove, right? Change positions about every 30 to 45 minutes. If you are uncomfortable in a position, your body's going to tell you. And it's not even going to be like, oh my gosh, this hurts so bad.
I need to move. It can be like that. But sometimes it's just like you feel the urge to move.
And I can't even describe it. It's like, oh, it's time to move. Like your body's doing it before you're even like mentally aware of it.
When I tell you your body knows what to do, I'm not joking. Next, we have a counter pressure and hip squeezes. This one is a game changer, especially if you've got back labor, have your partner or your doula or whoever's with you, press on your lower back or squeeze your hips during those contractions.
It relieves the pressure. It helps your baby get aligned. And it feels like sweet, sweet relief.
It is literally my, one of my favorite things. I didn't need the last time, but the second, third and fourth ones, my husband was sore the next day from all the squeezing. Probably grateful that I'm not yelling at him anymore.
Harder. Do it better. Move your hands.
Tell your partner this is for me. Tell them Taylor said that you get bonus points if you do a double hip squeeze and whisper birth affirmations at the same time. Number four, we have hydrotherapy, which is fancy, fancy talk for water.
Now, ideally, we'd love for you to get in the tub because water getting in the water reduces gravity's pressure, getting fully submerged really helps soothes the muscles and doubles your endorphins. Isn't that crazy? Your natural, your body's natural pain reliever doubles those blocking the pain signals. Plus it's just relaxing.
Okay. It's just real nice, but we've also got showers. And even if you don't have a shower available, which most of you probably will, if you're birthing at the hospital, you can even just have like a warm compress, heating pad, whatever, something to get those muscle muscles warmed up.
Gosh, I'm like tripping over words today. I promise I can talk. A little tip.
If you're planning on getting in the shower, pack some flip flops, please. Like there's a lot of stuff that goes down in the delivery room showers. Okay.
Pack some shoes and consider a little shower safe speaker. Keep your playlist going, your ambiance, your worship, your affirmation, whatever you've got playing, um, bring something like that, that hot water on your lower back though. And you're paired with a worship playlist, a literal heaven.
Are you kidding me? Moving on. Number five, vocalization. Moaning isn't a sign of distress.
It is strategy. We've already talked about it a little bit. Low open sounds literally help open your cervix.
I'm like, I heard it one time described as like, if you keep your lips open up top, your lips will open down below and your cervix isn't your lips. But you know what I'm saying? But those high pitched sounds, those like, you know, the screams, the, that, this, and like that can absolutely happen. No problem.
But like that usually creates tension in your body. Like everything's really tight. Everything's really high pitched and stressy.
But if you're like, I can, I don't really want to do it, but like ooze and Oz and things like that with every exhale, it might sound a little bit like, like some sex is happening in the room, to be really honest with you, but also the same hormones, the same positions, all that, the same stuff that gets baby in gets baby out. So it kind of makes sense. If your jaw's relaxed, your cervix likely is too.
There's a direct connection. So remember, loosey goosey with a little spice. Moving on to number six, we have heat and cold.
So heat equals relaxation. Use a rice sock on your back or your belly, a warm compress, a heating pad, whatever you've got available to you. And then cold equals numbness.
Use a cool washcloth on your face or your chest. If you're overheated or panicky. I know I always wanted a fan in the hospital because I would get so hot.
I definitely had a cold washcloth most of the time. Everyone's feeding me ice chips because I love those things. Where are my anemic girlies? Anywho, you might want to consider making like a little, um, comfort station or comfort spot in your birth bag with like some hot packs, some cooling pads, a little fan.
I like the little rechargeable ones from Disney World, like where you take to Disney World, not from Disney World. You know what I mean? Maybe you don't, but whatever. Google them.
Little rechargeable fans. Um, they're really great. Plug them into the wall.
Some of them have little misters and they get like the little water going in your face. Heaven. Anywho, number seven, visualization and affirmations.
This is, these things are really for your mindset. I mean, all of it's for your let's be real. Your brain believes what you feed it.
So your brain loves evidence, right? And if it's just collecting evidence of horror stories and all the terrible things that could happen and all the things that the doctors are going to do and say, and all the things that your friends have told you about their terrible, awful births and how everyone's keeps telling you, you're going to want the epidural and blah, blah, blah. Your brain wants to prove you right. If you think that's what's going to happen to you, it's going to try to prove you right.
It's how our brains are wired. So visualize yourself getting through the contraction like a boss. Visualize yourself holding your baby at the end of it.
Visualize yourself advocating for the birth that you want. Visualize you and your partner working together as you bring forth literal life. Visualize how you're going to feel that day.
Like take a moment and feel those feelings in your body. How's it going to feel? How's it going to feel when you birth that baby? Visualize your baby moving down and through the birth canal. Visualize the waves that you're riding, the contractions, the ups, the downs, the rest periods, the intensity, and then affirmations.
We're going to speak the truth, okay? We're going to tell our brain, hey brain, I know you think all these things. I know you're scared of this. I know there's some what ifs on the table.
I know you've heard some stuff. I know you've seen some stuff. And it's like, here's what's actually true.
It doesn't mean those other stories aren't true, right? But what do we want our brains to believe and focus on? Each contraction brings me closer to meeting my baby. My body was made for this. I am so close to the finish line.
I've prepared for this moment. I can do anything for a minute, especially for my baby. I can do anything for a minute.
Are you kidding me? You can even record yourself saying affirmations ahead of time. Or better yet, have your birth partner read them aloud during your labor experience. You can print some out.
I have birth affirmation cards if you want those. In season one, I actually did a birth affirmations podcast, which I hated doing because it felt so awkward, but I had it requested so many times that I was just like, okay, fine, I'm going to do it. So that's on there.
I don't know what it's like anymore because I forgot about it because my brain just threw that information away. But I guess it was good enough to post. So it's probably fine.
I'm like, I don't, I'm not going to listen to it. So it is what it is. I apologize if it sucks.
My kids are being very loud right now. So apologies. Hopefully you can still hear all my words and I'm going to try to edit them out.
But it is what it is around here sometimes. Take it or leave it. Number eight is touch.
Gentle strokes, hair brushing, hand holding. It's all oxytocin boosters. That's all it is.
Touch is like connecting with another human being. That's why we do skin to skin after birth because touching actually creates oxytocin. Oxytocin is actually what triggers our breast milk let down, which is created by nipple stimulation, which is why that is one of the only things that actually creates contractions in your body when you are wanting to, and I'm using air quotes here, but naturally induce.
It's a natural method of induction, but inducing is not natural, but I'm not going to get on that soapbox right now. I do not have the time. Anyways, touch equals oxytocin.
Oxytocin equals good. Massage also helps release tension. Also can give your partner a job to do.
We love making our men feel important, right? They love to feel that way. I know a lot of guys like, I just felt helpless. I didn't know what to do.
Give them a job to do. Okay, help him help you. Some people don't like touching.
I don't in certain situations. I get overstimulated real quick. I am a sensory avoider, so set the boundaries earlier if you know you're like that.
If you don't want touch during contractions, tell your team, talk to me only, don't touch, or just say, shut up, leave me alone, back up, whatever you want to do. Just set the expectation, whatever it is. You're the head girly in charge.
Don't forget. Number nine, your environment. Taylor, how is my environment a pain relief? Your environment equals your hormonal headquarters.
Your environment can disrupt the whole process so easily, and we don't even talk about it that often. The hospital space is not conducive for physiological birth. That doesn't mean you can't experience that there.
It's just going to take some effort. We're talking dim lighting. We're talking cozy blankets, maybe your favorite scents are in the room, little essential oil vibes, maybe some familiar sounds, your favorite songs, your, you know, the sound machine you sleep with every night, whatever it is.
And before anybody goes, oh my gosh, that's so extra. It's not extra. It's essential.
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. The more homey it feels, the more your body believes that it's safe to birth. Pro tip, if it doesn't feel like your vibe, change it.
Close the blinds, put a towel over the harsh lights, kindly ask people to lower their voices, or get the heck out. It's your atmosphere and you're the authority figure. Finally, number 10.
This one's for my Jesus girlies. Worship, prayer, scripture-based affirmations, inviting God into the process. I held Jesus's hand last time.
You could try that. That was fun. The birth isn't just physical, it's spiritual.
He created this process. He wants to be a part of it like everything else in your life. So pray through the pain and surrender to the process.
Write down some verses and prayers ahead of time because as with every day in life, if you cannot find the words, let the word carry you. Before we say goodbye today, let's talk some strategy. These are the things most people don't teach, but they're often the difference between I barely made it through and that birth was powerful.
First, practice now. Don't save this stuff for the big day. Start using your breath work during your workouts.
Use your hip squeezes for when you have back pain. Repeat the affirmations when you're anxious or some what-ifs pop up or you hear a bad birth story. Make these tools muscle memory, okay? Practice, practice, practice.
When you are in fight or flight mode, which can very easily happen in the birth space when our adrenaline pumps up and starts shutting our oxytocin and our endorphins down, that is a very difficult space to say, oh wait, Taylor told me to breathe and Taylor told me to do this and I wrote those affirmations down two months ago, but I never actually looked at them. What were those? Hmm. It is not the time.
You need these things in your back pocket readily available and highly practiced. When your brain gets to the point during your labor experience, and it probably will at some point because it happens and it's fine, but it's probably going to say something like, oh my gosh, we can't do this. Let's just go home.
Like if you have a choice, right? Like something bad's going to happen, right? It's trying to convince you to stop what you're doing, trying to keep you safe. But those thoughts of I can't do this and something bad is going to happen are going to feel really, really true in the moment. And unless you've practiced, unless you're prepared for that moment, you're probably going to succumb to it.
I see it all the time. So practice all these things now, please. Next, set expectations with your team.
Have a little team meeting or meet with everybody individually, whatever. Tell them what you need during labor. Assign the different roles.
I'm like everybody in the space is there to support you that day, but everybody has vastly different roles that day. I usually have my mom and my husband there and they have vastly different roles, right? Like they're both there supporting me, but they have two totally different jobs. My husband's very hands-on.
He's the one talking to me the most, all the things. My mom, she's like the little runner. She goes and gets anything we need.
She grabs, you know, towels and snacks and fans and drinks and she'll run to the store if we need it. And she'll, you know, all the things, right? She takes the pictures. They have two very different roles.
If we just show up that day and we're like, okay, well, what do we do? It's going to be unnecessarily chaotic. And you don't want to be telling people what to do if they could have already known it before you walked in the room. Of course, if it's your first time, you don't know what to expect.
You don't know how you want to be supported. Take your best guess. Okay.
And then redirect the moment. It's just so much easier that way. So make sure they understand your goals and their role in helping you achieve those.
And if somebody can't support your vision, they do not need to be in the room period. I just said it the other day on a Tik TOK or something. And I was like, y'all you're the daddy of your baby.
Isn't always the best choice as your birth partner. Not all of our partners are willing to step up and be the support that we need. Some of you guys don't have anybody in your life.
That's willing to step up and do that for you. So you need to hire somebody to do it. It's called a doula, like a birth partner for hire, you know? So make the decisions wisely and communicate please.
Next, please have a plan for exhaustion. Inside the birth prep course, we talk all about like an exhaustion prevention plan. But if you get to the point of exhaustion and that I can't do this moment where you just want to quit and you just want to be done.
It's so normal. Like I, I would assert that most unmedicated births you get to that point, right? But make a plan for it, have snacks, have some little electrolyte drinks, a little pep talk plan, ready to go. Write a letter to yourself if you need to, to read it when things get hard.
God's got you and so do you. And then talk to yourself like you talk to a friend. If you start to panic, ask, what would I say to my bestie right now? Probably not, oh my gosh, you're failing and you suck so bad and you're going to just completely ruin your whole plan.
No, probably something more like, you've got this one at a time. Breathe, baby, breathe. So be kind to yourself.
I know we can be really crappy to ourselves and we're not carrying that into our birth. Okay. Okay.
And then remember the rule of progress. If you are feeling overwhelmed, if you're feeling like, oh my gosh, I can't do this. If you are at that point, that is often a sign that you're transitioning, you are not failing, you're finishing.
And if you can surrender to that process, it goes a lot faster and a lot better. But that's when we get that spike of adrenaline that is needed for when it's time to push and all the things, but it can also derail the whole situation, right? So stay strong, stick it out. It usually means the baby is right around the corner.
And that is all that I have for you today. Let me just quickly wrap up those 10 because when there's 10 things, we're just going to go back through them real quick. Number one, breath work.
Number two, movement and position changes. Number three, counter pressure and hip squeezes. Number four, hydrotherapy, aka water.
Number five, vocalization. Number six, heat and cold. Number seven, visualization and affirmations.
Number eight, touch and massage. Number nine, your environment. And number 10, lean on the Lord.
You are not broken. You are not crazy for wanting to do this. Your body knows what to do.
You are not alone. You're a woman with a body designed to do this work, a mind that can be trained and a soul that can surrender. So continue prepping like the literal queen you are.
Use your tools, train your team, trust your body. And when the big day gets here, you're going to be so ready. All aboard the pain train.
And if you're ready to really dig deep into this work, you already know that the birth prep course is the thing for you. It helps you go from unsure to unstoppable. I will chat with you again soon.
Until next time, as always, happy prepping.
(Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message.)
