5 Lies You’ve Been Told About Birth (and What’s Actually True)

Let’s bust some myths, shall we?

If you’re planning an unmedicated birth—especially in a hospital—there’s a good chance you’ve been fed some straight-up lies about what’s possible, what’s allowed, and what’s “safe.”

And I’m here to lovingly (but firmly) call them out.

Because the more informed you are, the harder it is for anyone to take control of your birth experience. These myths are designed to keep you small, scared, and compliant. But not anymore.

So if you’re ready for the truth bombs, grab whatever you’re sipping on and let’s get into it.

Lie #1: You Have No Control Over Your Birth

What they say:
“Birth is unpredictable.”
“You just have to go with the flow.”
“It just kind of… happens.”

Why it’s a lie:
Yes, birth can be unpredictable. But that does not mean you have zero control.

That phrase “go with the flow” is often code for:
👉 “Don’t ask questions. Don’t make noise. Just let us do what we do.”

That kind of flow? It doesn’t serve you. It serves the system.

Here’s the truth:
You have so much control over how your birth unfolds.
You get to choose:

• Your provider (and whether they support your goals)

• Where you give birth

• Who’s in the room with you

• What interventions you accept or decline

• How you prepare your body and your mindset

Even something as “simple” as leaving your house to go to the hospital is an intervention. (Ask any home birth mama!) It can shift the way your body responds to labor.

So yes, you do have control—but only if you claim it.

Your action step:
Start preparing now. Not just by listening, not just by reading—by actually doing the work. Educate yourself. Build your support team. Set up your environment for success.

And stop “going with the flow” if it’s carrying you somewhere you don’t want to go.

Lie #2: Hospital Policy = Law

What they say:
“You can’t do that—it’s hospital policy.”
“We have to follow this rule.”
“We don’t allow that here.”

Why it’s a lie:
Let me say it loud for the people in the back:
Policy is not law.

Hospital policy is a set of guidelines that the facility prefers. That’s it. You are not legally required to comply with them.

Let me repeat that: You are not legally required to comply.

Whether it’s:

• Mandatory cervical checks

• Forced continuous fetal monitoring

• No eating during labor

• Lying flat on your back to push

You have the right to say no.

Your action step:
When a provider tells you, “It’s policy,” ask this magic question:

👉 “Can you show me the legal requirement for that?”

Watch how fast the vibe changes. Because most of the time, there isn’t one. And they know it.

You don’t have to go full legal eagle, but just a little knowledge about your rights can change everything.

Lie #3: The Only Pain Relief Option Is the Epidural

What they say:
“Why would you go through all that pain?”
“Just get the epidural.”
“Everyone does it.”

Why it’s a lie:
Let’s get this straight: I am not anti-epidural. If you’re fully informed and that’s what you choose—amazing. That’s YOUR call.

But the idea that the epidural is the only or best pain relief option? Absolute nonsense.

There are so many natural ways to manage labor pain:

• Hydrotherapy

• Counterpressure

• Movement and positioning

• Breathing techniques

• Massage

• Visualization

• Mindset tools

And here’s the thing: your body already knows how to birth. You just have to learn how to support it.

Your action step:
Start training. Not just hoping. Train your mind and your body to handle labor. Gather the tools. Practice them. Build that confidence muscle.

And stay tuned—I'll be doing a full blog post breaking down all of these natural techniques soon!

Lie #4: Bigger Babies = Harder Births

What they say:
“Your baby is measuring big. We need to talk about an induction.”
“You might need a C-section.”
“There’s no way you can birth that baby vaginally.”

Why it’s a lie:
There is zero solid evidence that a bigger baby automatically means a more difficult labor—or that you need an early induction or scheduled C-section.

Also? Ultrasound weight estimates are wildly inaccurate.
They can be off by one to two pounds in either direction. So that “10-pound baby” they’re warning you about might be a totally average 8-pounder. (Ask me how I know.)

Your body grows the baby it can birth. You are not broken. You were designed for this.

Your action step:
If your provider starts tossing around scare tactics, ask questions:

• “What’s the evidence for your concern?”

• “How accurate are weight estimates in your experience?”

• “What can we do to support a vaginal birth if my baby is big?”

Advocate for your plan. Your size, your baby's size, your pelvis, your strength—it’s all working together.

Lie #5: A Healthy Baby Is All That Matters

What they say:
“Well, at least you have a healthy baby.”
“All that matters is that your baby is here safe.”
“It’s okay, the outcome was good.”

Why it’s a lie:
Of course we want a healthy baby. That’s the bare minimum. But that’s not all that matters.

YOU matter.
Your voice.
Your experience.
Your trauma (or lack of it).
Your memories of that day.
Your mental health.
Your physical recovery.
Your bond with your baby.

All of it matters.

Too many women walk out of the hospital with a healthy baby but carry deep wounds—feeling ignored, dismissed, manipulated, and even traumatized.

I know because I’ve been there. And it’s not okay.

Your action step:
Don’t let anyone gaslight you into thinking your experience doesn’t count. You deserve a birth that is safe and respectful. That honors your voice. That leaves you feeling stronger, not smaller.

Final Thoughts: You Deserve the Truth

Let’s recap those five lies:

1. You have no control over your birth

2. Hospital policy = law

3. The epidural is the only option for pain relief

4. Bigger babies mean harder births

5. A healthy baby is all that matters

Every single one of those is false. And every single one has been used to rob women of their autonomy and power.

But not you. Not anymore.

You are becoming the HGIC—Head Girlie in Charge—and that starts with truth, education, and action.

Want More Support?

✨ Join The Birth Prep Lounge, my free Facebook group, where we go live every Friday at 1PM EST for Birth Prep Power Hour. You can submit questions, join the convo, and get real support from someone who’s been there.

✨ Explore The Birth Prep Course—your complete roadmap to preparing for your unmedicated hospital birth. Learn how to navigate the hospital system, advocate for yourself, manage labor naturally, and walk in feeling ready.

✨ DM me on Instagram and let me know what action steps you’re working on this week. I’d love to cheer you on!

You’ve got this, momma. And I’m here to help you every step of the way.

XO - Taylor